by Liesel Darby, Mediator & Divorce Coach

Growing up, you probably heard the "F-word" at some point, and it wasn't "fudge." In this post, we're talking about a different F-word, one that can quietly undermine your financial empowerment and overall wellbeing: FAIRNESS.

For women navigating careers, money, relationships, and midlife transitions, the belief that things should be fair can be a surprisingly powerful obstacle. Here's what the research and real life experience tell us about why fairness thinking holds us back, and what to do instead.

Why "Life Isn't Fair" Is Actually Useful Wisdom for Women

The concept of fairness seems harmless enough. It has the ring of righteousness. When things go our way, fairness feels like justice. But that's precisely the problem: the expectation that things should be fair sets us up for indignation, resentment, and paralysis when life doesn't deliver.

At the extreme end, a rigid attachment to fairness can keep us stuck, waiting for the world to ...

Financial empowerment is a crucial aspect of personal growth for women, enabling them to take control of their financial futures. This guide aims to provide actionable insights into building financial confidence, clarity, and lasting wealth. Women often face unique challenges in financial management, from societal expectations to a lack of representation in financial sectors. By addressing these issues, this article will explore strategies for enhancing financial literacy, effective budgeting, and investment practices tailored specifically for women.

Throughout this guide, readers will learn about the importance of a positive money mindset, practical budgeting techniques, and the basics of investing. Additionally, we will highlight resources and community support available to women seeking financial guidance. By the e...

Picture this: You just received your final divorce papers. It is sinking in that you are free to move on to the next chapter of your life. The only problem is that it looks suspiciously like yesterday, except if you wanted to marry someone tomorrow, you could. No one comes to mind. While you are planning to drink a glass of champagne later with your bestie to celebrate, it is only 10 o'clock in the morning, and the feelings washing over you are the exact opposite of celebration.

Now you are confused. You thought that once you were divorced, you would feel happy. Inspired. Free. Instead, all you feel is fear, sadness, and loneliness. This cannot be all there is, right?

The Overwhelming Reality of Life After Divorce

You know what your settlement numbers are, so you sit down to make a budget. Essentials are covered. Are weekly manicures considered essential? Apparently not. Daily Starbucks? Maybe if you pack your lunch every day, those can stay. What about Netflix? This is not fun.

Yo...

Financial conversations can be tough to navigate in life. Whether it's discussing budgets with your spouse, talking to your children about spending habits, or helping aging parents handle their estate, these discussions require courage and tact. Managing these challenging financial conversations successfully is crucial, and it's understandable if you feel overwhelmed. Rest assured, you're not alone. Many people face similar situations and find it comforting to have guidance and support. If you're looking for help in navigating these conversations, know that there are resources available to assist you on your financial journey.

As a financial planner and mediator, I deeply understand the challenges that conversations about money can bring. We've gathered a few valuable tips along our journey that we'd love to share with you.

We're here to provide support and guidance as you navigate these important discussions. With our compassionate and empathetic approach, we aim to help you achieve...

Navigating the complex waters of retirement planning for women can often feel overwhelming and daunting, particularly after experiencing significant life events such as a job loss or divorce. However, it's important to recognize that entering this phase also presents an empowering opportunity to reshape and refocus on a future that is tailored specifically to your needs and aspirations.

As many individuals begin to give retirement planning the gravitas it deserves in their 50s, it becomes increasingly indispensable for single women to approach this phase with both strategy and intention. This comprehensive guide is designed to provide you with invaluable insights, practical steps, and expert advice needed to instill confidence in your journey to a secure retirement. By equipping yourself with the right knowledge and tools, you can navigate the intricacies of retirement planning with ease, ensuring a secure and fulfilling future ahead.

A Guide to Retirement Planning for Women in Their...

If you have a college-bound young adult at home right now, I want to talk to you about something that probably isn't on your back-to-school checklist. It might matter more than the extra-long twin sheets.

Money.

Specifically: how to have an actual conversation about it before they walk out the door.

As a financial planner who has worked with women through some of the biggest money moments of their lives, I can tell you that the habits formed in those first years of independence tend to stick. The good ones and the not-so-good ones. And while you can't control every choice your kid makes once they're on campus, you absolutely can set them up with a foundation that will serve them for decades.

Here's how.

Start With Clarity: Know What You're Each Responsible For

The first pillar of my Intentional Money Method is Clarity, and it applies beautifully here. Before any conversation about budgets or credit cards can go well, you and your young adult need to be crystal clear about the bas...

I have been through this more than once.

I have been unexpectedly laid off. I have made a deliberate decision to walk away from a career path that was no longer right for me. And I have built a business from scratch without a guarantee of what the first year would look like financially.

Each time, the thing that made the difference was not courage or optimism, though those help. It was preparation. Having a financial plan that gave me enough runway to make the leap without free-falling.

A career change is one of the most significant financial transitions a woman can make, especially in midlife when the stakes are real and the margin for error feels smaller. But it is absolutely navigable. Here is how I think about it.

Start With Clarity Before You Start With Job Boards

Before you update your resume or start researching new fields, get honest about where you stand financially right now.

This is the Clarity pillar of the Intentional Money Method. You cannot plan a transition withou...

Divorce often leads to changes in every aspect of your life, especially your finances. It can be particularly daunting when you have to rethink and re-plan your retirement strategy. However, planning for retirement after a divorce doesn't need to be overwhelming. With the right approach, you can turn this life-altering experience into an opportunity to create a solid, customized retirement plan that works best for your new lifestyle.

Understanding the Impact of Divorce on Retirement

Divorce often results in splitting assets, including retirement funds, which may significantly reduce the amount you had planned to live on during retirement. It can also lead to increased living expenses, as you shift from shared costs to bearing them independently. Both of these changes can profoundly affect your original retirement plan.

Moreover, divorce can have various tax implications, like potential penalties for early withdrawal from retirement accounts or changes in tax filing status. These con...

Through watching my grandfather's approach to life and money, I learned truly valuable financial lessons that continue to guide me today. This wisdom was particularly meaningful given that my father's approach to finances served as a stark counterexample of what not to do.

My grandfather, who would have been 100 years old this year, grew up during the Great Depression. Those formative years shaped his entire philosophy about money, security, and what truly matters in life. The principles he lived by aren't outdated - they're more relevant than ever in our world of instant gratification and consumer debt.

10 Timeless Financial Lessons from the Greatest Generation

1. Live Below Your Means

My grandfather embodied the principle of living below one's means. This wasn't merely a saying but a lifestyle he embraced, shaping his prudent financial habits throughout his life. He prioritized long-term financial security over the allure of short-term material gain - a discipline that allow...

I remember the full range of emotions I felt when I bought my first house in 2007. Pride that I was doing something so significant. Worry that I was making the wrong decision. Excitement to finally have a place of my own. And overwhelming anxiety about all the new expenses and responsibilities ahead of me.

What I didn't realize at the time was that I was doing exactly what it takes to build financial confidence. I was taking intentional action, even in the face of fear.

Building financial confidence is a journey, not a destination. With each financial decision, we get an opportunity to flex our confidence muscles. Yet so many women shy away from these moments due to fear, self-doubt, or the belief that they don't know enough yet. What if the very act of making decisions, imperfect, uncertain, sometimes scary decisions, is exactly what builds the confidence we're waiting to feel?

Clarity and Values Come First

Before you can take confident financial action, you need two things: cla...