What is your biggest fear? Ask a child and they may respond that it's spiders or snakes or some other creepy-crawly. However, as we grow older, we begin to realize that there are other kinds of things to fear. For example, fear of losing a job or fear of not being able to pay the mortgage.
The consequences of the things we fear can seem unbearable. Money fears are no different. So, what do most people do? Lie and hide. That's right. I said they lie and they hide. They lie to themselves about how serious things are, and they hide their fears or their consequences from others.
Some of these may be the very people who could help, but fear and shame keep them from admitting they are in trouble.
Getting honest about money when you are in trouble feels risky. In some cases, it can cause harm, and in others, it can create worse case scenarios. From missing a payment and having an adverse credit score to causing financial damage to a business or institution, money problems run the gamut.
The truth is, hiding won’t work. Eventually, the issue will come out, and the situation will be worse than it has to be. So, what can be done to get the courage to get honest about money when you are in trouble?
Start by talking to someone. If you can’t be honest with your family or anyone directly related to the situation, seek neutral advice and help. Whether that be an accountant, a trusted friend, or an attorney, someone has the answers you need. Sometimes getting sound advice helps clear the air and makes it possible to solve problems. Once you have a better handle on what is happening, you can meet with those closest to you and have the tough conversations.
“If we can share our story with someone who responds with empathy and understanding, shame can’t survive." - Brené Brown
For support from other moms, you can always join our free Facebook Group: Moms Managing Money.
A lot of money problems come from bad habits. In other words, you've gotten into a routine of making poor choices when you know there is a better alternative. Start doing what you know is right today. Start a savings account and build up your emergency savings. Don't spend money on things you cannot afford. Do everything you know to do, and your conscience will be eased.
Many financial mistakes, especially in young adulthood, happen because we don’t know any better. Keeping your head in the sand won’t make the lessons more comfortable to learn. If you need some education about money or how it works, find the right solutions, and get the know-how.
We offer tons of resources on this website and in our Facebook group. In addition, check out our recent post on The Latte Factor. That's a great book to start learning the basics of managing your money.
"Education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the world." - Nelson Mandela
Face your money fears. Being honest about your money and any weaknesses you have with it can change your life. It can take you from being a victim of poor choices to successfully reaching your financial goals. Stop fearing your financial situation. Get honest and do whatever it takes to be in integrity and command of your money.
Other posts from our series on facing financial fears:
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