How to Choose a Financial Advisor: What Women in Midlife Need to Know

Start With Clarity on What You Actually Need

Before you talk to a single advisor, get clear on what you are looking for. This is the Clarity pillar of the Intentional Money Method applied to the advisor search itself.

Are you looking for someone to manage your investments? Help you build a comprehensive financial plan? Guide you through a divorce or major life transition? Support you as you approach retirement?

The answer matters because different advisors specialize in different things. An advisor who is excellent at wealth management for executives may not be the right fit for a woman navigating post-divorce finances. Someone who specializes in young families may not have deep experience with the retirement planning questions you are sitting with right now.

Know what you need before you start looking.

Understand the Different Types of Financial Advisors

This is where a lot of people get confused, and it is worth taking a minute to get clear.

Fee-only advisors charge you directly for their time or a flat percentage of assets. They do not earn commissions on products they recommend. This structure removes a significant conflict of interest. I personally work on a fee-only basis because I believe transparency matters.

Commission-based advisors earn money when they sell you products, like insurance policies or mutual funds. This does not automatically make them bad advisors, but it does mean you need to ask more questions about whether what they are recommending is truly in your best interest.

Fiduciary advisors are legally required to act in your best interest. Not all advisors are held to this standard. Ask directly: are you a fiduciary at all times? That last part matters. Some advisors are fiduciaries in some contexts and not others.

Check Credentials and Verify Them

Credentials tell you something about an advisor's training and areas of focus. They do not guarantee quality, but they do give you useful information.

A few worth knowing:

AFC (Accredited Financial Counselor) — My credential. AFC holders have significant training in behavioral finance and are especially equipped to work with clients navigating debt, budgeting challenges, and the psychological side of money.

CDFA (Certified Divorce Financial Analyst) — Also my credential, and the one you want if you are going through or recovering from divorce. CDFAs are trained to analyze the financial impact of divorce settlements.

CFP (Certified Financial Planner) — One of the most recognized credentials in financial planning. Broad training across financial planning areas.

CFA (Chartered Financial Analyst) — Deep investment expertise. More common in portfolio management than personal financial planning.

You can verify credentials through FINRA's BrokerCheck at brokercheck.finra.org. Look up any advisor before you meet with them. Check for complaints, disciplinary actions, or anything that gives you pause.

Ask the Right Questions in Your First Meeting

A first meeting with a financial advisor should feel like a conversation, not a sales pitch. Here are the questions that matter:

• Are you a fiduciary at all times?
• How are you compensated? Do you earn commissions on any products you recommend?
• What types of clients do you typically work with?
• What does your financial planning process look like?
• How often will we meet and how do you prefer to communicate?
• Can I see a sample financial plan?
• What happens to my account if something happens to you?

Pay attention to how they answer, not just what they say. A good advisor welcomes these questions. Someone who gets defensive or evasive is telling you something important.

If you want a full checklist to bring to your first meeting, this post walks through exactly what to cover.

Watch for These Red Flags

I have seen a lot of portfolios over the years that arrived on my desk after a client realized something was wrong. Here is what to watch for:

Products over planning. If an advisor is eager to sell you specific products before truly understanding your situation and goals, that is a warning sign.

Vague answers about fees. You deserve to know exactly how your advisor is compensated. If the answer is unclear or keeps changing, push harder or walk away.

Pressure to act quickly. Good financial decisions rarely need to be made in 24 hours. Any advisor who creates urgency around signing or investing is one to be cautious of.

No questions about your life. The first conversation should include questions about what you want your life to look like, not just your risk tolerance. If an advisor never asks what matters to you, they cannot build a plan that actually serves you.

One-size-fits-all approach. Your financial plan should be built around your specific situation, values, and goals. If it looks like something they hand to everyone, it probably is.

The Right Advisor Will Feel Like a Partner

This is something I talk about a lot with my own clients. A true money partnership is built on trust, transparency, and the sense that someone is genuinely in your corner.

You should feel comfortable asking questions, even ones you think are basic. You should never leave a meeting feeling more confused than when you walked in. And you should trust that the advice you are getting is in your interest, not theirs.

If something feels off, trust that. It is okay to keep looking.

Review the Relationship Annually

Finding a good advisor is not a one-time decision. It is an ongoing relationship that deserves regular evaluation.

At least once a year, ask yourself: am I getting value from this relationship? Do I feel heard and understood? Is my plan evolving as my life evolves? Do I trust this person?

You have every right to change advisors if the answer to any of those is no. Your financial future is too important to stay in a relationship out of inertia.

The Bottom Line on How to Choose a Financial Advisor

Choosing a financial advisor is one of the most consequential financial decisions you will make in midlife. Take it seriously. Do your research. Ask hard questions. And do not settle for someone who does not feel like the right fit.

If you want support thinking through your financial decisions alongside a community of women who are doing the same work, that is exactly what the Empowered Sisterhood is for. Join us.

Keep Reading

What to Discuss With Your Financial Advisor: A Meeting Checklist The questions to bring to your first meeting and every meeting after.

Building a True Money Partnership What a healthy relationship with your financial team actually looks like.

The Intentional Money Method The values-based framework I use to help women make financial decisions that feel like theirs.

5 Smart Ways to Become a Better Investor Whether you are working with an advisor or on your own, these fundamentals apply.